© 2019 by Caroline Wright

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On showing your feathers

October 15, 2019

 

 

 

 

I met guy, we got to chatting.  I found myself liking him.  Consequently, I instantly felt I was in trouble. I was informed enough about the do's and don'ts of dating to understand that if I were to begin showing interest, as I like to do when I'm—well—interested, there was potential that the relationship could fade.

 

Why?

 

-It's simply human nature.
-Anything you chase in life runs away.

-Our species are not designed to be monogamous creatures.

 

According to history, research, opinion, and/or experience (take your pick), if I were to remain relatively aloof, he should theoretically stick around and even remain persistent. However, there is also the flip side of frustrating a person...

 

 

...

 

 

 

...

 

 


...

 

 

 

...

 

 


…you guessed it.

To the point of ghosting.

 

 

 

 



Stuck at an Intersection

 

Cars zipping past like mechanized people
dressed in various shades of chalk, tinsel, lapis;
the fiery ones catch your eye, and—BAM—they are gone,
fast as recent prospect on a dating app.
The novelty comes and goes in a matter of minutes,
between traffic light changes,
or seconds—a pause at a yield sign.
Sometimes, the power goes out and you look in all directions, wondering, Who is driving, and where are we going?

 


Google the following: “principle of least interest.”
 

(You’re welcome.)

 

It’s fascinating stuff, and begs a very intriguing question: How does one display just enough interest to hold someone's attention (without prematurely turning them off); additionally, avoid having the tables turned on them once they finally decide to 'show their feathers' and invest in the relationship?

 

In a society where courtship, dating, and mating is a competition, what is the best strategy to play for a tie?

 

---

 

I'd hate to leave you on a rhetorical note, so if you find yourself scratching your head, check out the recommended reads below. -xoxo

 

For Women:
 

Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl–A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship by Sherry Argov.

 

For Men:

 

The Man's Guide to Women: Scientifically Proven Secrets from "Love Lab" About What Women Really Want by John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman

 

Chris Maynard from Olympia, WA, is a full-time artist who collects feathers of birds when they shed or discard them each year. He then recycles them in his art. He believes "feathers mark nature's pinnacle of achievement: the intersection of function and beauty."

 

For more feathered fine art, check out Chis's website, FB page and IG account, all sharing the same name: "Featherfolio."

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