My co-worker suggested I watch "Hector and the Search for Happiness" on Netflix.
And so I did. Now you should, too.
But, if you don't, here are some points Hector discovered on his journey to becoming an "emotional warrior":
-Making comparisons can spoil your happiness
-A lot of people think happiness means being richer or more important
-Many people only see happiness in their future
-Sometimes happiness is not knowing the whole story
-Avoiding unhappiness is not the road to happiness
-Happiness is to be loved for exactly who you are
-Fear is an impediment to happiness
-Happiness is feeling completely alive
-Happiness is knowing how to celebrate
-Listening is loving
-Nostalgia is not what it used to be.
After watching this film, you *may* never perceive the trilogy of laughter, sadness and fear the same way again. You *may* even start seeing things, people, and circumstances in your life differently, much like Hector did.
How do you tell someone
you hardly know
you love them?
Look them in the eyes.
Feel it, too.
Illusions prove that things aren't always what they seem. An optical illusion can reveal two identical lines that look incredibly different; a still .gif image can appear as though moving; we see faces in inanimate objects. And yet, seeing is believing....right?
We perceive through our senses. Our brain processes information. Our body responds either intuitively (with that "gut feeling") or via conscious reasoning.
In relationships, while we are taught to "go with our gut", in reality, we tend to side with reason:
...she's so beautiful. (The ultimate optical illusion!)
...he was there for me when _______.
...she missed me.
...he keeps me company.
...she said she'll do better.
The issue with reasoning, however, is it often diverts focus from within and defends another's actions or attributes (sometimes on a non-conscious level).
When you go with intuition, you side with yourself, first and always, and eventually, reasoning catches up:
...I smile more when we're together. (She makes me happy.)
...I have more energy. (He supports me.)
...I enjoy spending time together. (She is fun to be around.)
...I talk positively about him/her. (He/She is good to me.)
...I am myself around him/her. (He/She loves me for me.)
Reasons are good, but be sure yours are backed by intuition as much as possible; otherwise, your actions can end up being driven by conscious beliefs stemming from nothing more than illusion. (Warning: There's emotional involvement here.). If you're not an intuitive person, you can certainly become better at it: keep track of your thoughts in a journal, meditate in order to hear what's in your heart (without judgment), or find a solitary place you can go to notice and access your inner thoughts. It takes practice to master, of course, but keep in mind practice won't do much if you resist this change. (Nostalgia is not what is used to be.)
A state of happiness is more easily recognizable when you see past the illusion—ironically achieved by either opening or closing your eyes—because that's when you truly start to hear yourself and others. (Listening is loving.)
Marybel Martin from Portland, Oregon, has been drawing, painting and creating characters since she was a child. She is passionate about creating and sharing the magical characters that live in her imagination.
To peek inside her imaginative mind and life, visit: www.marybelmartin.com
Also, check her out on Instagram: @marybelmartin